I sat in my white midi dress, with my shoes too tight and my hair too frizzy. I watched as slides flicked across the screen in front of me, recognizing district journalism student achievements. 

Joining the sea of applause, I try to focus on the feeling of my hands clapping together. I try to focus my eyes on my adviser on the stage, or the seat in front of me, but I can’t. 

My eyes just keep returning to the unaligned text placed next to a photo haphazardly. Or the square photo that could be vertical. Or the header text being a little too small. 

I can’t stop proofing.

The entirety of my four years in high school has been spent in the journalism room, closely analyzing pages, making sure the fonts are correct and every element is exactly where it should be.

Are the photos aligned to the grids?

Is the headline a pica away from the text?

Is the dropcap 4 pt?

I ask myself these questions all the time; constantly looking for ways to improve pages, websites and even billboards on the highway.

Even when I am far away from room 151, and journalism isn’t even a thought in my mind, I cannot shake out the habits that this program has instilled in me. What scares me the most is that the skills I have used every day for the last four years, like knowing which point size is correct and keeping the endless stream of fonts logged in my mind, might sit unused for years. 

The need to look for mistakes in everything, the eyes I use to proofread pages at 9 p.m., the voice I use to leave critiques, what are these skills good for if not journalism? Why am I holding on so tight to these habits that won’t blend into my everyday life the way they did in high school?

These skills I have gained to help the newspaper look the best it can, to help maximize consistency, constantly follow me like a lost dog. With just weeks left in the year, I’m frantically searching for a way to leave it behind. To shed my proofing eyes and move on and out of the journalism room. But I can’t.

My grandpa asks me what I’ve been learning at school, expecting to hear some tidbit I heard in government or some book I’ve been reading in English.

But what he doesn’t know is that I’ve learned more life-applicable skills from journalism than I have anywhere else. Not volunteering, or NHS, or even Financial Literacy. 

When asked about school, all that comes to mind is all the pages I’ve designed and the stories I’ve edited. Or the critique I got that changed my outlook on everything I’ve designed, or my journalism trip to Nashville.

The skills I have from journalism carry through every other aspect of my life. From how I talk to people and write emails to taking on extra tasks and giving positive reinforcement to the kids at work, the most important lessons I have learned in all of my 13 years of public education were learned from journalism (and honorable mention on how to read, thank you Mrs. Sanders).

While it’s hard to walk away from high school, specifically journalism, I will always hold onto all of the things I’ve learned. And although I wish I could look through a magazine and not silently critique the design, I wouldn’t trade my permanent proofing eyes for anything.